5:00am Alarm sounds. John hops out of bed to quickly end the buzzing sound. I briefly open my eyes to see if he’s going to get back in bed… or do the completely ridiculous thing of actually GETTING UP when the alarm goes off.
We placed the alarm clock across the room to help with the, ahem, hitting of the snooze button deal. Why does this plan always seem to fail?
5:09am The buzzing starts again. I don’t even bother opening my eyes this time. John will hit snooze.
Right?
John? John? Now I have to open my eyes.
Oh good grief. He DID get out of bed nine minutes earlier. What craziness. I open my eyes wider and notice the downstairs light is on. I’m sure he’s already down there with his big ol’ mug of tea and his open Bible. What kind of crazy person gets up this early?
I close my eyes.
Get up.
Oh GREAT. Wonderful. It’s Good Me talking.
“Go to sleep, Good Me.”
Nope. Get up. You’re supposed to be running right now.
“I don’t feel like it.”
You have a race to run in a few months. You don’t have a choice.
“Oh, YES I do, Good Me. I can just close my little eyes here and doze… right… off…”
Ah, ah, no you don’t. Swing those legs over the side of the bed and grab your shoes, Lazy Bones.
“It’s too dark. It won’t be light for almost two hours.”
That’s what the gym is for, remember?
“But running at the gym isn’t quite the same as running outside. I need to run outside. And it’s just too dark for that. The Boogey Man will jump out of a bush and get me. I’m waiting for Daylight Savings Time to end.”
Even though you’ve clearly watched one too many episodes of Law and Order, you’re right. It probably isn’t the safest to run the neighborhood this early. I’ll give you that. But again I say, that’s what the gym is for.
Silence. I can’t think of a good comeback.
Hello? That’s what I thought. Now get out of that bed before I…
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
I open one eye, but just a little.
5:18am.
The kids are sick. This is your one and only chance today.
You know you’ll regret it if you don’t go.
I push back the quilt.
“Alright. Alright. I’m going. Just don’t talk to me anymore about it.”
I change my clothes, grab my shoes, brush my teeth.
Walk downstairs with my eyes still only slits. I give John a kiss and tell him I’m heading to the gym.
He smiles. He guesses at the argument that just ensued between me and Good Me.
“There’s a cup of coffee waiting for you. I waited to see if you wanted it in a regular mug or a travel mug. Here you go.”
See? What a sweet guy. Aren’t you glad you’re going to the…
“Be quiet, Good Me.”
I was just saying I think you…
“I said QUIET.”
I head out the door and climb in the truck.
It’s dark.
In the two minute drive to the gym, I see four or five guys out on their morning run.
“Lucky ducks. THEY can run without being afraid of the Boogey Man. I bet they don’t even carry a can of pepper spray.”
Then I see a girl out jogging in the pitch blackness.
Clearly, she hasn’t watched enough Without A Trace.
By 6:30am, I’ve run a few miles on the treadmill. I really, really didn’t feel like it. I got a bad cramp in my calf after only a few minutes and seriously wanted to just stop.
But, hey, if I’m going to make it 13.1 miles in January, I’m going to have to learn to do what I don’t feel like doing. Keep going when it hurts. Make it to that finish line.
6:35am–I push through the glass doors leading to the parking lot, holding my water bottle and wiping my sweaty face with a towel.
And there, coming over the mountains in the distance, are the soft pinks and blues of the sunrise. The crisp, cool morning air surrounds me and cools me off as I stand there, mesmerized at the sight. The tops of the trees are glowing shades of green and light yellow and I catch a glimpse of the sun’s shape peeking over the leaves. In a place usually filled with shouts and laughter as kids play in the child watch program and in the nearby grassy field, the stillness of early morning is almost piercing in its very peacefulness. The only sound is that of my own breathing.
I’m awestruck.
So are you glad you got up, or do you still want me to be quiet?
“No, you can talk. It was good I came. Very good.”
I thought you’d think so. Remember? The best things–the things of value, the moments you’ll remember for years, the things that build strength–they’re worth a bit of effort. Sometimes they aren’t convenient, or comfortable, and some are outright painful. But you’ll always be thankful when you’ve endured. They’re always worth it.
“I know, Good Me. Oh, and you know what else? I don’t think Your name is really ‘Good Me.’ I just thought You were ‘me’ because we were talking about, you know, running. Not spiritual things.”
I know, my child. You tend to forget the spiritual and physical are intertwined. You don’t have any “good” in you, remember? It’s all from Me, your Heavenly Father. I have big things planned for you in this race. A lot of lessons to teach you.
“And here I thought I’d get a little break from all that hard-lesson-learning after the deployment.”
Oh, my daughter, the lessons are never over. I have so much to show you! Just remember, they’re always, always worth the pain.
You just have to get up and get started.
Ginger says:
You just have a gift!! That is all I have to say. You get me laughing at the beginning of your post by the end I am soul searching! Thank you for the reminder!
Ginger~
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Mishel says:
And this from the girl who hated just walking around the block in high school! I’m proud of you for getting up and going to the gym. But I’m mostly thankful for the fact that you listened to the still, small voice of the Lord. : )
Love and hugs,
mama
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
Mandi says:
Ok, I SO needed this post. Not just for the running references (I’ve been shushing “Good Me” for weeks now and snoozing the alarm till it’s too late) but also for the spiritual references. You are a fantastic writer! Thank you for sharing :-)
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
Carrie at dumptrucksandteacups says:
hmmm…. it’s always so good to hear His voice…
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Tiffany says:
Ok so Im pretty sure its ok to talk to yourself but I think its borderline a problem when you start to answer yourself. :)
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Jenny H. says:
I can’t remember how I got here, but I’ve been reading for a few months now. Aside from letting you know that your slide show/video when your husband came home made me bawl, I havn’t commented. I just wanted to tell you that I just love your blog. I enjoy your writing style and the content seems so thoughtful and relevant!
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Erin says:
:), Ashliegh you crack me up.
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Pam--in Jerusalem says:
Great post! I have to ask… What kind of job does your husband have that he’s still at home to watch the kids at 6:30?? I don’t think my husband ever got to stay home that late when we were there. Glad it works out for you… be thankful for it!!
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 10:31 pm
Megan says:
Oh how wonderful! I’m dying to go to the gym!!! Sorry, I didn’t completely miss the point. I actually got it and loved this post– but after reading the comments, got back on the running/gym aspects. It’s just not the same with a double jogger, is it?
[Reply]
October 15th, 2008 at 10:43 pm
Valerie aka Mamalovelock says:
Wonderful post! Thank you.
[Reply]
October 16th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
Jenna says:
I LOVED this through and through!!!
[Reply]
October 16th, 2008 at 7:18 pm
Anne says:
That was a good post… I find I have the same conversation each morning as I prepare to go for my walk. The only difference is, I’m in Thailand so there are no boogey men, but DOGS. Lots of dogs:).
[Reply]
October 17th, 2008 at 2:55 am
Melanie says:
Sleepy Me and Good Me have the same conversation every morning too. Hilarious to read that it happens in someone else’s head as well.
[Reply]
October 17th, 2008 at 8:28 pm
Mommie Blogs says:
This is the blog I needed to read. You now have motivated me to stop making excuses and get to the gym. BTW – great post, totally hilarious (the monologue) and inspirational at the same time.
~ Courtney
[Reply]
October 18th, 2008 at 8:11 am
Christie says:
Okay, I came here to thank you for the absolutely kind and thoughtful comment you left on my blog. Instead, I find myself sitting here with tears in my eyes, feeling as though your words have pierced my soul.
Nice to meet you.
[Reply]
October 19th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
bessie.viola says:
This is an awesome post, and hugely inspirational to me. Great writing.
Found you through mamasphere – will definitely be reading more to catch up!
[Reply]
October 21st, 2008 at 11:33 am
looksgoodinpolkadots says:
Beautiful.
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October 21st, 2008 at 2:43 pm
ElfTea says:
I was just looking around the net and was led to your blog. You inspire with a light touch. Nice wrtting
[Reply]
October 21st, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Adventures In Babywearing says:
Wow, this was just beautiful.
Steph
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October 22nd, 2008 at 10:40 am
Stephanie says:
That is so awesome that you’re pushing yourself to do this…and that you have such a wonderful and supportive husband. You’re going to do awesome. Just keep talking :)
[Reply]
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:30 pm