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The Number

(and a chance to win!)

February 19, 2010

(I know this is a long and rambling story, but it took some serious guts to get it all written, and I decided to just leave it as is… bear with me, if you will… there’s good stuff in the end. Promise.)

Let me tell you about my darkest, most hated enemy.

I call it The Number.

I dread meeting The Number.

Sometimes just thinking about it makes me sick.

I engage in mortal combat with The Number… and yet it always seems to win.

The Number has the potential to send me into a pit of depression and self-loathing, of insecurity and despair.

I meet The Number on the scale every morning.

I know, I know. Weighing every day isn’t healthy. Or it is healthy. Or something. But The Number and I have been constant companions for so long that I hardly know what to do without it.

We weren’t always enemies. We weren’t friends, either. We were simply indifferent to each other until one fateful 8th grade day.

I stepped on a scale, out of curiosity, and gasped. There was The Number, scowling at me. I glared back… and vowed to lose 15 pounds.

I did. But by the time 9th grade hit, it wasn’t enough. High school friends (yes, even the sweet conservative homeschooling girls) compared weight like new dresses. I’ve gained two whole pounds this week. I need to lose ten pounds. UGH, I weighed 102 this morning. Do I look pregnant?

The Number and I were at serious odds. So I did what every high school girl does… and stopped eating. As much as I could get away with it, dinner was often my only meal. Dinner and ice cream–a lot of ice cream. It worked, it made me fit in, and I felt good about my “self control.”

When I got married at 18 (I know… that’s another story) my 5′6” frame held 118 pounds. I told people I weighed 120 because I was trying to gain weight to fit into the wedding dress I’d bought months earlier and I was tired of being reminded to eat. I wasn’t exceptionally active (jogged a piddly half mile a few times a week and did a Pilates video most mornings) and had little muscle tone, but at 18 and thin, I wasn’t too worried.

Ever heard of the freshman fifteen? Tack on marriage and you’ve got twenty. Over a year later, we found out we were expecting our first little one, which added yet another 35 pounds of baby weight, but it was all gone within a month of holding the baby in our arms. I was back to my pre-baby weight, but still a good 25 pounds over what I’d been two years prior.

Thus began the freaking out.

I knew I wouldn’t ever be 18 again. I knew it was illogical to expect a pre-baby body again. But still I did.

I began to make self-conscious jokes about my weight, thinking at least people would know I was aware of it. (Now, remember, I was a very healthy size 6 or 8 at the time, but compared to my wedding day size 4, I was convinced I was overweight.) My insecure self secretly hoped to be reassured–again and again–that I wasn’t fat. I jogged in the mornings with my husband, the baby in the jogging stroller, and cut my calories to (wince) 700-800 a day.

Then, 11 months after our oldest was born, I was shocked to find out there was another baby on the way. I mean, we clearly knew how these things happen; we just weren’t expecting it to happen so soon.

I went into this second pregnancy happy to be much thinner than I was at the beginning of my first, but I still lamented the baby weight I knew was soon to come. I ate more during both pregnancies, for the babies’ sake… but my family will tell you they still had to remind me to eat breakfast and lunch.

Baby #2 was born and I found bouncing back after the second baby to be a bit harder. The weight didn’t fall off, but I was too busy with a toddler, a newborn, and my husband’s upcoming deployment to fret about it.

When the baby was two months old and my husband had been in Iraq for two weeks, a friend suggested I join the gym down the street. She and I started out walking on the treadmills a couple afternoons a week while our littles played (or slept) in the child care program.

But I tend to be a bit radical. A month into the membership, walking wasn’t enough. Soon I was at the gym five or six days a week, running, weight training and attending every class I could fit into my schedule. I’d never been so active–or so fit–in my life. I had found my happy spot.

I lost around twenty pounds, and though I was nowhere near my 18 year old weight and had yet become a pro at the weight-related comments (if you can name it, the monster isn’t so big, right?), I felt I was making progress, gaining muscle tone and enjoying the stress relief exercise provided.

But I still wasn’t eating much. Nightly ice cream was my staple and weekend binges were common, though I always “made up for it” by eating as little as possible the next day.

My husband came home from Iraq, I took my running outside and began training for a half marathon.

I never did that 13.1 miles.

Life got crazy. My previously very stable, very well respected father rocked our world by leaving my mother and my brother unexpectedly in a scandalous affair and shattering the foundation upon which I’d built much of my life. My family was a mess and even as an adult daughter, I was a complete emotional wreck.

I would spend a day crying, shoveling brownies, chips and Taco Bell into my mouth, and follow it with a week of guilt  and starving myself. My stress level was at a lifetime high and I was spiraling into a pit I didn’t recognize. I gained five pounds and hired a personal trainer to help me figure out why The Number was going the wrong direction. I spent six weeks working with her… and I gained ten more pounds.

I saw one doctor and had my first round of testing done. I saw another doctor. I had more tests. I gained more weight. I cried. More tests. New diets. Less exercise–because what was the point if I was just going to keep packing on the pounds?

I cried more. For my dad, for my mom, for my brother, for what this stress was doing to my own husband and children.

I prayed that if God was trying to teach me some sort of lesson about body image or letting go or insecurity, that He’d do it quickly. I prayed for answers.

I finally saw a doctor about two months ago who sat and talked and listened and tested and figured out  the root of the problem.

A) A vicious cycle of starving, binging, starving. “It seems to work at 16… then you have children and it’s a whole different story. You’ve broken your metabolism.”

B) Stress. “Intense, sudden stress mimics hormone disorders. It sends your body into survival mode.”

~~*~~

In the past year I’ve gained 35 pounds.

I have everything from a size 4 to a size 14 in my closet and I’ve worn all of them at some point in the past three years.

(You know what I’ve learned above all else in this? People still love me regardless of the size on my tag. But that’s a topic for another day.)

It’s time for some changes. Changes toward overall health–mentally and physically.

This is why my two friends, Mary from Giving Up On Perfect and Jessie from Vanderbilt Wife, are partnering with me in hosting a ten week weight loss challenge that focuses our own individual health goals. None of us will be sharing The Number publicly, because the goal is about overall health, but instead will tell the body weight percentage we’ve lost.

And we want you to join us.

LosingItBanner1

Mary will be hosting a link up every Friday for the next ten weeks for you to link to your post about your own weight loss. The participant who loses the highest percentage of body weight through healthy means and links up at least six of the ten weeks will–perks!win a gift card to Dick’s Sporting Goods, a pedometer provided by Weight Watchers and a 6-month subscription to the healthy, whole-foods-based menu planning program, The 6 o’Clock Scramble.

So grab the button from the sidebar, use the banner, and join us in our rally for health and change in each of our lives.

I’ll be sharing here, each Friday, about my healthy endeavors (I tend to be a bit of a whole foods junkie, believe it or not) and my balanced exercise goals. Mary will host the link up, but you can click over from here or Jessie’s blog as well.

My goals:

  • As for food? My main goal is to eat. To fix and eat three, solid, healthy, portion-controlled meals each day. And maybe (gasp!) to fit some wholesome snacks in there, too.
  • I would be thrilled to lose 20 pounds during this challenge (that’s a healthy two pounds per week). But I’m not going to freak if I don’t. I do need to lose weight, but most of all I need to be healthy.
  • Drinking water is imperative, especially at our new high-altitude home. As is getting adequate sleep. I’m going to aim for a hefty dose of both.
  • I’m going to attempt (this is a biggie) to stop talking about my weight, other than in relation to this contest. No jokes. No attempts at self-depreciation. No, “Do I look fat in this?”

I’m going to get healthy.

Because The Number is not going to rule my life any longer.

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40 Comments »

  1. Tammy L says:

    I love all your blog posts, even though I too rarely comment (but do pray!). THANK YOU for sharing your heart with your readers! :)

    Keeping a balanced approach to fitness and weight is a struggle for me too… especially when as a mom, our food needs change through pregnancy, breastfeeding, and not. :)

    I’ll be praying that God will bless your efforts towards a healthy, balanced way of eating/exercising… and give you lots of sleep… and relieve all that stress. :)

    Love you!!

    February 19th, 2010 at 1:16 am

  2. Lindsay Udom says:

    It’s great to start treating your body better. What we feed ourselves, whether we strengthen our muscles or not, and getting sleep all affect how we function in our daily lives. But a word of caution to anyone who (like I once was) gets too obsessed with their weight… God created out amazingly intricate bodies with loving thoughtfulness and therefore we have no right disrespect them. Many of us are disappointed with what we see in the mirror or photos, or feel inadequate next to thin or athletic people. Simple healthy living should be a priority, but a number (weight) should not. Our Father saw fit to gift us with these bodies, as different and unique as each one is. Your healthy weight is whatever weight you are when you make healthy eating choices, get some exercise daily, and get pleanty of sleep.

    February 19th, 2010 at 1:20 am

  3. Erin says:

    Wow, so respect you for posting this. I have my own battle with self image/health/weight that I’m working on, hopefully this will keep me motivated. Not quite ready to blog about it yet :) but interested to see what you guys do over the next few weeks.

    February 19th, 2010 at 3:07 am

  4. Amanda says:

    I loved this entry!! I read, always, but comment rarely, I’ll comment!

    I’ve had major issues with weight for ummm… 10+ years now. Which is a lot considering I’m only in my mid twenties!

    Like you I’ve got clothes in a wide range of sizes (4-12!). I gained a ton of weight right before my wedding last year, and lost 30+ pounds in the past 6 months, but still have 10 to go before I’m back to a size 6. Maybe your posts will help motivate me! :)

    February 19th, 2010 at 4:49 am

  5. Allison says:

    Wow! I think you wrote this for me. I was extremely thin all through high school and my twenties until 2nd baby came along at 26. After he was born, I did not worry about losing the weight or anything for that matter because he was sick. I gave up on eating healthy. I just ate. Now at 32, I am at my heaviest. Am I extremely overweight, no but I need to get it under control now. Thanks for this and I also rarely ever comment but always read.

    February 19th, 2010 at 5:30 am

  6. LeAnna says:

    You can do it, girl! Thanks for being real (as always!). I struggled with weight after I got married and gained that 15 pounds. Then I gained FIFTY pounds while pregnant, and God really had to do a change in my heart after I had my son, because I started to really fret about body image. Now you have me a little nervous about baby #2…*wink*

    February 19th, 2010 at 5:45 am

  7. Megan (FriedOkra) says:

    I’m so sorry for all that you’ve been through but so amazed at how strong and resilient and positive you’ve remained through it all (overall – I know there are tough times emotionally, but overall!) Your faith shines through so clearly and you really honor and shine a spotlight on God with every word you write. I am so happy for your resolve to get healthy and excited about your project with the others and I will be praying and cheering you all on! Go Girls!

    February 19th, 2010 at 6:03 am

  8. Megan (FriedOkra) says:

    So I went away and then I got to thinking again about how you make those comments about your weight to show people you’re aware of it and also see if you can get them to make you feel better about it and I realize! I do that too. Not about my weight so much but about my intelligence. I’ve always sortof prided myself in being “smart” – I did well in school, very well, and learned to identify myself that way. I was the “smart girl.” Well now school was a very long time ago and life has a way of making a 40 year old stay at home Mom who’s been out of the work world for 5 years feel a little foggy and dull. (sleeplessness doesn’t help much) So I poke fun at myself for being “blonde” or “a few bricks shy of a load” in the hopes that people will realize I KNOW I’m getting dumber by the day and that they’ll say, “But it’s okay you’re still smart somewhere in there and anyway you’re loveable even if you’re dumb as dirt.” I’ll have to think about it a little more, but I’m guessing I need to try what you’re trying and stop doing that because really what does it accomplish? Sends the wrong message to everyone, including myself. Thanks for making me think about it another way! I thought I was just being funny, but really I’ve been being destructive, haven’t I?

    February 19th, 2010 at 6:37 am

  9. Kati says:

    You are such a great writer-thank you for once again sharing your personal struggles with us. I too am struggling with The Number. And the fact that I don’t fit in my old clothes. I am working on exercising more (something I rarely did before) and trying to keep my mind off The Number. I am also trying to cut myself a break since I had a baby four months ago, but it is time to get moving. Thank you!

    February 19th, 2010 at 6:48 am

  10. Rachel says:

    Ashleigh,

    I’m one of those who reads, but doesn’t comment often. I’m not in a place where I’m struggling with my weight right now, but I’ve been through an almost identical experience with my parents (dad left mom for another woman, etc.), and I want to thank you for your honesty.

    My parents’ separation and subsequent divorce has inflicted huge amounts of stress on me, the eldest daughter, and while the stress didn’t affect my weight, it contributed to a host of other symptoms, including severe migraines. I felt like the entire situation was out of my control, but part of the healing process included realizing that I *could* choose to control how I allowed the stress to affect me. I’ve entered into a new sense of peace since making that choice last fall.

    I’m heartbroken to know that other Christian families experience what I did, but I’m also comforted by knowing that God is faithful in such difficult situations. I’ll continue to keep you and your mom in prayer.

    February 19th, 2010 at 7:14 am

  11. Leah says:

    Thank you for your openness and transparency, Ashleigh!

    I laughed about the line where you said girls in highschool will say, “UGH, I weighed 102 this morning. Do I look pregnant?” LOL! So funny and so true..

    I think it’s easy for us as women to use weight loss/health as a form of control. When life sends us a blow and we’re stressed out, we freak out because we have no idea what’s going to happen… so instead, we consume ourselves with weight loss programs, fitness, etc. because it gives us a sense of SOME control. I’ve seen it with sooo many ladies. I’ve never had a HUGE struggle with this myself, but someone very close to me HAS. Not to say I’ve never had issues with this either… infact, the last 2-3 weeks I’ve been doing a pilates program and will continue to do so in the next couple weeks… all because I thought my tummy area needed to be slimmer. ;-) And then I was challenged. The Lord said that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I don’t need to have a bad self image because my tummy area isn’t as slim as others! However, I do think that there IS balance in all things, and it’s wise to eat a healthy, balanced diet and get good excercise.

    I’m learning more and more that security can only be found in Jesus!

    February 19th, 2010 at 7:34 am

  12. mishel says:

    Those of us who *really* know you, know just how hard this post was for you to write.

    I am so PROUD of you, baby girl!!! PROUD!!

    Writing this and being transparent and truthful…about your weight issues AND the pain of this past year…is a HUGE step.

    I am with you. I support you. I am praying for you!!

    Love,
    Your #1 Fan (besides John)
    (aka Mama)

    February 19th, 2010 at 7:37 am

  13. Kelly @ Love Well says:

    I’m so proud of you, Ashleigh. I’d love to join the challenge, because goodness knows I’ve packed on the pounds the last few months. But I think I’m going to need to wait until the baby is born in May to make any real progress. ;-)

    This had to take a lot of sweat, blood and tears to write. I’ll be following your progress and cheering you on, all the way.

    February 19th, 2010 at 9:35 am

  14. Holly says:

    Your honesty and “realness” are so refreshing. I think many women, even though we don’t all struggle in the same way, make unhealthy choices because we feel we have to look a certain way, reach a certain Number, have a certain image, etc. But you are overcoming. You’re not letting your circumstances dictate how you are going to live your life when you could so easily give up and say “forget about it”.

    I needed your encouragement today- you have no idea. Thank you for sharing your battles, and for encouraging your readers not to let outside factors rule our lives.

    ~Holly

    February 19th, 2010 at 10:34 am

  15. alison says:

    Sigh, The Number. I don’t think I’ve ever met a woman not wrapped up in The Number. I wish our self worth wasn’t wrapped up in it, but the truth is, it is. As much as we say it doesn’t matter, as much as we wish it didn’t matter, it does. It shouldn’t, but it does. Of course, The Number doesn’t matter to those who know and love us, but it matters to us.
    It’s a stupid number that distorts our thinking and makes us do stupid things to our bodies. I hate The Number.

    Thank you for sharing your struggles. Your honesty is refreshing and real. I wish you all the best as you set out on this journey. Mostly, I wish that you find yourself healthy, happy and at peace, no matter what The Number is.

    February 19th, 2010 at 1:28 pm

  16. April says:

    Go you! Seriously.

    It is SO hard to live healthy in this country…I’m still trying to figure it out. I’m looking forward to hearing about what you’ll be doing.

    February 19th, 2010 at 1:38 pm

  17. Sarah S. says:

    Gah! We really do walk many similar roads, don’t we? Yes, precious child of God, you MUST get healthy inside your head before you can get healthy outside. Your LAST goal should be your first and most important — “out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks”. Imagine everything you think/say about your body as something you would say to a precious friend. Would you DARE say such horrible things (even the things you don’t say out loud)? Your other goals are very good, and once you get your head healthy about your weight, your outside will reflect it — but you can’t do it backwards.

    Proud of you and can’t wait to hear about the journey.

    February 19th, 2010 at 2:56 pm

  18. Jessica @ Life as I See It says:

    Have you ever read the book Warrior Diet? I haven’t read it personally, but my husband did and I got the gist of it from him :) Basically you eat in the evenings – and can snack on fruit or veggies during the day if you’re feeling weak. I don’t know if you’re doctor would suggest it being healthy for you to do that with your history and metabolism, but it worked amazingly for my husband and I have started it too.

    My husband left yesterday for two weeks (he’s Army). He goes away frequently, but for short periods of time. It’s so heartbreaking for my boys and they’re already having a hard time and we’re one day in – I’ve been thinking about you guys and your boys especially with this one year deployment coming up. Will continue praying for you all.

    February 19th, 2010 at 4:02 pm

  19. Nicole says:

    Oh, Ash! *Hugs*

    I love my dearest, and ditto on what your mom said: I know this was/is hard for you to write and I’m very proud of you. :)

    It is truly a pleasure to watch Christ work in your life as you grow into the woman HE wants you to be. :) Thanks for being honest, thanks for being real.

    February 19th, 2010 at 4:10 pm

  20. Miriam says:

    Thank you for sharing! I can relate to much of what you have gone through. I’ve given birth twice in the last 26 months (youngest is 1 now), and I too have gained those extra pounds that I can’t lose! And it doesn’t help any that over these months pregnancy cravings and now hormonal swings and my body tries to maintain a regular cycle while I’m breastfeeding, make it irresistible to have yet another chocolate bar, or McDonalds meal, or homemade dessert. What I need is the self-discipline to control what and how much I eat. But you have inspired me to FINALLY DO IT!

    My other challenge besides the extra pounds, is my “baby belly”. I HATE the extra flab around my middle from being pregnant! And all it takes is a little exercise every day, and I know I could get rid of it. But have I? No, I’d rather sit on the couch and eat some more chocolate cake. :-/ I have to conquer this!!

    Thank you again. I will be participating in the contest if at all possible.

    February 19th, 2010 at 7:22 pm

  21. Elizabeth in Alaska says:

    ::Hugs:: Ash, thank you so much for being real… like your mom, I know this was probably really hard for you to write. I used to think from your blog posts back a year or so ago, “Wow, she goes to the gym a lot! She is so disciplined!” Just goes to show how many of us are fighting private battles. Weight isn’t one of mine, but there are others, so many others… Love you!

    February 19th, 2010 at 10:24 pm

  22. Jen says:

    I had to stop weighing myself while I was pregnant, simply because I’d see myself encroaching on The Number that was totally “unacceptable”, and make the mental note not teo eat much that day.

    And then, as my boobs got bigger (and thus more heavier) with each pregnancy, I had to stop again, because my weight didn’t corelate to my measurements. I haven’t weighed myself (except for the one off at my first midwifes appointment) in over 2 years.

    I still struggle with the way I look. I hate having photos taken. I still find it unbelievable that my husband finds me insanely hott.

    I appreciate this post so much Ashleigh. Thank you.

    February 20th, 2010 at 12:06 am

  23. Laura Stanberry says:

    Ashleigh,
    this post hits home. here is the root of the problem, so many of us seek to find our worth in that golden number or that “perfect” size. Until I discover that my true value is found in Christ, I will never measure up to who I think I should be. I have the opposite struggle. I love to eat. I honestly probably think abut food all the time. if I had just one weakness I could eliminate it and more than likely loose the weight. but I have had to learn to balance food as a whole. in the past year I got lazy those 35 pounds I lost crept back up on. I am back to the same wight comments you mentioned. I feel like everyone looks at me and sees “the fat girl” Here I am 30 years old and I should be over that. I look in the mirror and say such hateful things to myself sometimes it’s scary. so the first step in this journey to being healthy whether it be a size 16 or 6 is to give up that hatefulness, and by loving God, maybe in the process I will find that love He has for me will help me see myself as He does.
    well sorry for the novel
    I have really enjoyed reading your blog

    February 20th, 2010 at 6:00 am

  24. Samantha R says:

    I’m proud of you and your endeavors! You go girl!
    I have read quite a bit about how stress can throw your body out of whack and how starving yourself can actually help you put on more weight… but little did I know just how big of a deal it actually was. (I studied this sort of thing during my natural health course some years ago)
    But you’ve opened my eyes to how big of an impact weight can have on someone.’

    *hugs*

    I’d love to join but in all honesty, I don’t really need to :)
    I’ve never really had a weight issue at all though neither have I had any children… hehe ;)
    The only time I ever freaked out about my weight was during puberty and I gained like 15 lbs one year. *shock*
    But I learned that was normal when you grow 3 inches in one year and gain hips etc…. I just didn’t know it at the time.

    I think a lot of girls obsess about their weight and looks at least once in their life. It’s normal abnormality?

    I’ll be praying for you though and hoping your make your goals!

    Good luck and many blessings,
    Love ya!!
    Sam

    February 20th, 2010 at 9:44 am

  25. loveofahero says:

    I just wanted to say that I really appreciate your candid honesty in this article, Ash. I don’t have battles with The Number right now, mostly due to the fact that after a year of loneliness and anxiety eating away at my appetite I am smaller than I should be for my health. But now my husband and friends are pushing me to push The Number higher, and I fully agree with and act on their assessments. But sometimes this inward pride flairs up in distress that my very small jeans are feeling tight again. This article is very good for me to read. Thanks again for sharing it.

    February 20th, 2010 at 9:44 am

  26. Gretchen Acheson says:

    My hubby said he’s going to email you to say thank you. I said he should probably wait until the END of the 10 weeks to know if it actually did me any good. But the second I told him about this and that I was thinking of doing it–not with the idea of losing weight, but with the idea of exercising–he jumped right on the wagon of “a little accountability, huh?” ;)

    So Big Merritt says thank you to Little Merritt’s mommy. :) And here’s to 10 weeks of good eating for you and me both! HUGS

    February 20th, 2010 at 3:37 pm

  27. From the Little Pink House | Chocolate Chips & Baby Fat says:

    [...] joining the 10-week “Losing It (not just our sanity)” competition, hosted by, among others, my friend Ashleigh.  Not to lose weight, mind you—I’m still a nursing mamma—but to lose that bulge of baby fat [...]

    February 20th, 2010 at 3:39 pm

  28. Julie says:

    I don’t beleive I’ve ever commented before either, but I am very blessed by your writing. I’ve been on a weight gain/loss rollercoaster for the past 10 years. I started a blog months ago, but never got back to it. I’ll be dusting it off now and joining you on Fridays – if I can figure out the linky thingy. Thanks for your honesty and authenticity. Best wishes on the changes you are beginning.

    February 20th, 2010 at 4:26 pm

  29. ladyfelicity says:

    From one 5′6” girl to another …

    *Hug!*

    February 21st, 2010 at 4:50 am

  30. Natasha says:

    I’m excited about this!!! I was just praying yesterday about working at my weight again. And then I saw this. So encouraging!

    February 22nd, 2010 at 7:27 am

  31. Katie says:

    Your transparency is such a joy to me, Ash. Thanks for sharing – I don’t know a single woman who doesn’t struggle with The Number in some way or other – this one really rings true.
    I’m excited to check out the resources you posted, and hope to follow along in my own version – right now, I’m not so much battling The Number as I’m fighting with The Post-Two-Babies Lack of Muscle Tone and Abundance of Not-So-Firm Skin. But that’s a lot longer to say…
    :)

    February 22nd, 2010 at 12:59 pm

  32. Hillary @ The Other Mama says:

    Love this and love you. I think your story is wonderful- scarred and truthful= wonderful.
    You are going to do a great job!
    And I am so proud of you all!

    On a completley different note, why did I think you moved to the East Coast? Am I losing my mind???

    February 22nd, 2010 at 10:36 pm

  33. Heather says:

    UR awesome girlie! (this said while trying to ignore the ever shrinking waistband of these ole jeans I’m wearin’ ;))

    February 23rd, 2010 at 10:05 am

  34. Heart & Home » Speaking of It says:

    [...] The Number (and a chance to win!) [...]

    February 25th, 2010 at 10:34 pm

  35. Heart & Home » Finding Beauty says:

    [...] written about my own struggles with physical beauty in recent weeks. We all agreed the task of discovering beauty can become a [...]

    March 18th, 2010 at 1:03 am

  36. Megan says:

    Hey there! I read your blog post on Sarah Markley’s page and found you here :) I was interested to see what your story was about weight…I too have struggled with it for quite some time, and recently been working towards not being so negative and talking about my weight/image. I think our husbands and friends will appreciate us more for it :) good luck in your challenge! thankful to come across your page today!

    March 18th, 2010 at 2:29 pm

  37. Joy says:

    Hello,
    This is my first time ever on your blog. I just stopped by from Tammys recipes. I want to say thank you for your story. My story sounds just like yours! I hate my number and most of all I can’t stand the feelings my number makes me have. I want in on the challenge too. Thank you so much for your honesty!
    Joy
    nice to meet you!

    March 25th, 2010 at 6:51 am

  38. Heart & Home » Losing It–Week Five says:

    [...] posting kind of girl, but in the spirit of Losing It (Not Just Our Sanity) and healthy eating and remembering to fix myself breakfast and thinking of my husband’s favorite foods and ALL THAT JAZZ, I thought I’d post one [...]

    March 26th, 2010 at 1:06 am

  39. M&M’s and Jesus | From the Little Pink House says:

    [...] even though I saw a higher number than I wanted to when I stepped on the scale this week, even though I have not made the time to [...]

    April 2nd, 2010 at 12:51 pm

  40. Heart & Home » Intentional says:

    [...] The Losing It Challenge is a 10-week weight loss competition hosted by Mary at Giving Up On Perfect, Jessie at Vanderbilt Wife and yours truly. For the full scoop on this and the rest of my weight loss journey, go here. [...]

    April 10th, 2010 at 7:45 am

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